Who wants Megan Fox to suck the life out of them? Here's a little New York Times TIME waster!

Goddammit. I wasted 5 minutes and 47 seconds listening to the ever-vapid Megan Fox being "interviewed". I swear, now she's trying to be Shiloh Jolie-Pitt by coming up with some crap story of wanting to be called "Dorothy" as a child. I call bullshit. Shiloh started it by the entire world calling her "John" from Peter Pan, and Miss Fox knows this. She's copying a three year old's fantasy life!


Megan Fox goes on to say that women are the "hardest" on her. Awwwww. Are we? Oh, and we're supposed to feel sorry for her being cast as the "Mean Girl" because she's a brunette. I grew up in SoCal, and as a brunette I can tell you that in REAL LIFE, it's not the brunettes I worried about. (Okay, two of them were and they were sisters, but they don't count.) Wink, wink, nudge, nudge.


The worst part of this pseudo-artsy black and white clip (by famed photographer Lynn Hirschberg no less!) is just how truly DUMB Megan comes off looking. Between her babydoll voice, admitting that she puts "no thought" into permanently modifying her body (that God-awful Marilyn Monroe tattoo on her FOREARM) and her deep thoughts regarding (gag) cat hair, she needs to get down on her knees and thank someone for her career. (You can hear it from a mile away, can't you?)

She already did get down on her knees for her career. (Rimshot!)

Now who's the brunette Mean Girl, Megan?

Sorry. That was mean.