Jake and Reese - The Break-Up. Why is anyone SURPRISED?

Oh, Jakey.

If I find out any ANY ONE of you are surprised about the "break-up", I'll be very disappointed in you.

Reese was so over being The Facial Hair.

But you didn't hear that from me. 

Kevin McKidd - One Hot Ginger (And the Recommended Weekend Movie that Kevin McKidd is NOT in...

Hotish Scottish!

(or should it be Hot Scot?)

Nevertheirregardless (thanks David Sedaris, for that word), let's all give this darling Scotsman Kevin McKidd a good look, shall we?

I first saw Kevin in the epic ROME series back in 2005-2007, and in Hannibal Rising the same year. He was fantastic in ROME as "Lucius". Then Patrick's a-hole ex-partner (whom I LOATHE) was a producer on the TV series, Journeyman, which was canceled after just one season. Patrick met Kevin on several occasions and said that he was a warm and delightful man. I think he has very kind eyes, don't you? Cutie McHotScot.

Patrick had and unintentionally hilarious walk-on during an episode of Journeyman when they were filming in Headquarters San Francisco. There was no way you could miss Patrick doing his best Julian Kaye-walk (Richard Gere in American Gigolo) with his queer dog, Sam. I nearly peed when I saw him in his scene. If you haven't seen American Gigolo, Gere walks very slowly and kind of tipped backwards in a very snooty manner.

Could I be a little more ADD this morning? I go from Kevin McKidd to Patrick to Richard Gere. 

Let's make American Gigolo the Recommended Movie of the Weekend just for fun.

"A Single Man"

Tom Ford, Designer/Writer/Director

and Hot Piece of Ass 

 

Madonna looks tremedous

at the "A Single Man" Premiere

As I'm sitting here doing "research in my office" (read: trolling the internet from my Sleep Number Bed), I've decided to do a piece (that sounds fancier than post) on That Hot Piece of Ass, Tom Ford, and his new film, A Single Man. 

Gay? I could not care less that Tom's gay. So much so, that I kind of lost my mental footing and asked Stephen probably the most ridiculous question in our married life: "Isn't TOM FORD, like, the hottest gay man EVVVERRRR??" As we all know, we have a picture That Hot Piece of Ass, Tom Ford hanging in our walk-in closet--and it's not just for MY viewing pleasure. (You've all heard the story of "so if you had to be gay for a dude, who would it be?", and Stephen's answer without missing a beat was That Hot Piece of Ass, Tom Ford!!) Hey, we have framed photos of Angelina Jolie all over the house (including the master bathroom, so it's cool, right?)


Where was I, forpitysake? Ah, yes. The Single Man. I know my darling queers out there know all about That Hot Piece of Ass, Tom Ford and his major success as an iconic fashion designer, but did you know that he wrote and directed this new film? (I know they all know, but I have to fill in the straights on this shit, too.)

Read and learn, people. Read. And. Learn: via ONTD:


"Stepping out for an evening of cinema, Madonna attended a special screening of “A Single Man” hosted by The Cinema Society and Bing in New York City on Sunday (December 6).

Held at The Museum of Modern Art, the Material Girl was decked out in her finest garb, mingling with a guest list including Nicholas Hoult, Julianne Moore and Tom Ford.

As for “A Single Man,” the Tom Ford directed drama stars both Miss Moore and Colin Firth, along with Matthew Goode, Ginnifer Goodwin and Keri Lynn Pratt.

The highly acclaimed film is described as “a story that centers on an English professor who, after the sudden death of his partner tries to go about his typical day in Los Angeles.” 
 
A Single Man in HD

Trailer Park | MySpace Video

Okay, I just read this "piece" to Stephen (so he knows when I'm talking gay shit about him). He said, "I didn't SAY "That Hot Piece of Ass, Tom Ford"...I just said TOM FORD."


The. End.

Jake Gyllenhaal and Reese Witherspoon Break Up! GASP! *UPDATE*

I'm soooo not surprised.

There are days when I feel writing about gossip is trite and meaningless. Today is one of them, considering the shocking and horrific murder of four local police officers. 

So. Jake and Reese are DONE. Big. Fat. Gay. Surprise.

I left this comment on another blogger's (www.busybeeblogger.com) site:


OhforPITYSAKE, BB. You KNOW their relationship was all a sham. Reese was Jakey’s beard. It behooved her so that her little perfect name wasn’t dragged through the dirt (like Aniston’s) when her cheating husband dumped her ass. AND, it sorta (but not really) kept Jake’s gay rumors at bay. I read weeks ago about a couple who would be breaking up and using the “conflicting schedules” excuse.

That's all. 

Just in case you've missed the freakout over Adam Lambert's AMA performance Sunday night...

 

 

 

So. Here are some photos from Adam Lambert's performance last night on the AMAs. 

The biggest reaction I felt during Adam's entire song was, "Wow. Someone's trying waaaay too hard." I don't remember the song itself. I only remember Adam stalking around the stage waving his arms around, Britney-style, while pretending to be tough and sexy. I didn't fall for it one bit. 

Now, Miss Adam is going on the record whining about "discrimination" and "women have been pushing the envelope on stage for years", presumably pointing to Madonna. Adam? You. Are. Not. Madonna. Nor, are you Lady Gaga. 

I'm bored.

Adam Lambert Kissing, Grinding and Trying to Out-Do Lady Gaga on the AMAs **UPDATE**

Yeah, this is what everybody's gabbin' about: Adam Lambert kisses a dude, shoves his crotch into someone's face and screams that screech of his with his tongue out during the finale on the AMAs. (I know, it's the voice lessons that taught him that.)

It'll probably get cut from the west coast feed just like JLo's ass tumble was cut! ('Cause she'll cut a bitch.) 

So if Lambert's performance has been cut (still hasn't aired on the west coast) Adam told Rolling Stone Magazine he considers the cut to be discriminatory:


“It’s a shame because I think that there’s a double standard going on in the entertainment community right now,” Lambert tells RS backstage after the show at Los Angeles’ Nokia Theatre.

“Female performers have been doing this for years — pushing the envelope about sexuality — and the minute a man does it, everybody freaks out. We’re in 2009; it’s time to take risks, be a little more brave, time to open people’s eyes and if it offends them, then maybe I’m not for them.

My goal was not to piss people off, it was to promote freedom of expression and artistic freedom.”


I guess we'll see what happens.

I'm hearing whispers of Anderson Cooper replacing Regis, y'all.

Pssst. It would make DivaJulia's dream come TRUE!!

Who's with me on this? The question should be, who isn't?? OhdearLAWD, I'd be in heaven if the rumor of Andy replacing ancient Regis Philbin and joining Kelly Ripa for their morning show! (I may have started the rumor...)


Listen, CNN ratings are down people. I know Andy likes to pretend he's Mr. Hard News (ahem), but we all know what a snippy gossip he is--the ratings would be off the charts if he would just follow his heart and team up with Kelly. This gig would be much better for little Mr. Delicate, who caught the swine-flu, along with the sexy Dr. Sanjay Gupta the second they arrived in Afghanistan recently.


I want to see a show of hands of those in favor of seeing Anderson Cooper replace Reege!


Now if we can only get Justin Timberlake to join SNL for even just one season! Online petition, anyone?




 

My Best Gay, Patrick is Comin' Home Today!

Oh, Patrick.

I'm pickin' my gurrl up from the airport today with his queer German Shorthair, Sam. (Remember? We call James my boxer "Ennis" and Sam "Del Mar". If you don't get it, Google Ennis Del Mar.)

 

         Sam squeals like a girl. FYI.

I can't wait to see my best friend...and hopefully, Patrick's home for good. I'll keep y'all posted!

Kate Hudson in NINE - This looks AMAZING.

To quote my husband, "I just love a production number"! I cannot believe how great Kate Hudson looks and sounds in this clip from the director Rob Marshall's upcoming film, NINE.  If you recall, Rob directed the phenomenal Chicago, as well. I love this stuff and I cannot WAIT for the movie to open on Christmas Day.

The film stars Daniel Day Lewis, Penelope Cruz, FrozenFace Nicole Kidman, Sophia Loren, Marion Cotillard, Kate Hudson, and Judi Densch.


To see the Official Trailer on YouTube, here you go:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y_5_lzags3I

Who wants to go with me??

Anderson Cooper needs a vacation, too! A $3200 a night vacation in India.

Andy with his boyfriend Benjamin Maisani in India

Well now. What do we have here? 

One of my favorite Silver Foxes might be feeling a little glum because CNN's ratings haven't been so great of late...but that didn't stop him from going on a holiday to India with his cute boyfriend, Benjamin.

via allheadlinenews.com

"According to New York Post, the 42-year-old "silver fox" has been spotted with East Village bar Eastern Bloc owner Benjamin Maisani at the Rambagh Palace, which is named as the best hotel in the world by Conde Nast Traveler.

The room costs $3,200 per night and features a four-poster bed and views of the gardens of the former Maharaja palace. It also has a large round bathtub, which was filled with bubbles and sprinkled with rose petals on the first night."

The Ranbaugh Palace

Rose petals? Really? 

 

I did a little snooping around regarding Benjamin's NYC club Eastern Bloc. In a word, it sounds FABULOUS--in a dirty, strong drink, red-walled, hot bartenders everywhere kind of way. If only this were 10 years ago when my Best Gay Patrick and I were in a place in our lives where we did this kind of hard partying every.Single.Weekend. I'm exhausted just thinking about it. Oh, Jack and Karen.

Those were the days, my friend...  

My second-favorite Project Runway designer, Chris March reviews last night's show--MEEEOW.

This dress was PERFECTION, remember??

via TVGuide.com
 
I'm afraid Project Runway will never, ever top Season 4 with Christian, Chris, Sweet Pea, et al...it's a simple fact of life.  There will forever be comparisons to that fantastically talented group. (Oh, I heard Christian Siriano, that fierce little winning bitch, will be on Oprah next week! Check your TV listings!) Thank goodness someone picked up Chris March and his hilarious criticisms (and laugh) to review this season's snore/bitchfest.

Chris nails it on everything. Especially regarding what a C U Next Tuesday Irina is. I screeeeeam at the TV when she's on dogging everyone's else's work ethic--even if she's right. Having said that? I'd totally wear her winning design from last night.

HIP OH CRIT. That's me, y'all!!

Today's Blind Item - JAAAYZUS!! I'm gonna start calling this the "Guess who's GAY" Edition

"Which dancing hunk would rather be doing the mambo with a guy? Though publicly straight, he’s been carrying on an affair with a man for years, and he intends to keep it secret."

via Blind Gossip

Wow. Obvious McDerekHough? Yeeeesh. Keep yer shirt on.

Adam Lambert on cover of Details Magazine - Scandalous!

 

Haayyyy!!

Adam Lambert is torturing those poor little girls (and moms) out there who think they may just be the One who will pull  him into their loving, girly arms. Not. Gonna. Happen. Check these pictures out from the latest Details Magazine. It's almost like getting to see Elvis getting nasty up in here. Glambert gossips about it all!

via Details Magazine:

"Adam says regarding kissing girls, "I am gay, but I like kissing women sometimes. Women are pretty. It doesn't mean I'm necessarily sleeping with them."

Regarding the art of entertainment, "It's all fantasy -- that's what entertainment is. I'm here to entertain you, and if my sexuality is apparent and you respond to it, and you're attracted to it, then great, I'm doing my job." 

Now, wait just a gosh darn minute!

Miss Adam also Tweeted yesterday: "Gaga wrote the song a while ago and she thought it would be a good fit for me. It's a solo track. I feel so honored and lucky to be asked" and then "GaGa just gets it, you know?" 

I'm sure I'll totally buy Adam's new cd titled, "For Your Entertainment," which drops November 23rd. Are you guys gonna get it?

Photo credit: Alexei Hay for Details

Today's Blind Item - Cheating Handsome Homosexual Edition

"This openly gay actor has been in a committed relationship for YEARS, but he’s been having a secret affair for several months with a toy boy half his age. It’s his personal trainer. To complicate matters, this actor and his partner decided to adopt a baby, and now the partner is pushing to hurry things up. The trainer is freaking out because he hoped the actor would leave the partner for HIM! What will our gay actor DO?"

via (Janet Charlton)

Honestly. If this is who I think it is, I'll be super-sad. Everyone loves him.

I love you guys so bad...but, "No Homo", right? HA!

THIS is pretty goddamned funny for a Saturday morning.

Just because I would TOTALLY break my lesbian cherry (isn't that Ben and Jerry's ice cream flavor?) with Portia DeRossi....ya know, no homo, right? Pssh. As IF. How 'bout Total Homo? That's more like it.

SWOOOOOON.....

For these rappers to feel the constant need to say "no homo" in their lyrics means only one thing: They're all on the down low. (I love making blanket statements), and for those of y'all who might not know what I'm referring to, check this out: 

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=down+low+ ).

C'mon you rappers out there (because I know you're readin' this), IT'S ALL GOOD!!

Oh, Li'l Wayne. Oh, Kanye. Don't you know what a positive impact it would be (sorta?) to the gay community if you would just come OUT already?

Who's THAT Bitch?

"Just another player in your game for two..."

Photo: Tabloid Prodigy VIA Towleroad

No. Way. You have GOT to be kidding me. Just what is he trying to achieve....sigh.

Nevermind.

Whoopsie!

Yeah. It's him. Lance Bass. And to my Gays? I guess, you're welcome? Or, I'm sorry.

Ohmygod, I'm gonna die. Chrisitan Siriano is getting his own show on Bravo, Bitches!

Behold the fierceness that is 
Christian Siriano - Winner of Project Runway, Season 4



Oh gurrrl. It's about GD time, y'all. I never get tired of hearing that little nasal bitch whine. I could use his blathering as background music during the day when I'm writing, just to keep me in the mood. ("Thaaaaanks, Moooood", as Tim Gunn swishes.)


Bravo will be following Christian around as he opens his own boutique and works on new collections. I love his work, his sensibilities, his gorgeous designs and EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM.

 

Work it OUT.

"Single Ladies" performed by football team on "GLEE" last night--GENIUS.

I'm completely on board with my production number-loving husband on the joy of watching "GLEE" each Wednesday night on FOX. 

Last night was absolutely genius and just darling. If you're not watching it by now, you really need to be. It's just fantastic. 

Does this make up for my bitchiness regarding Pinchy McLemonhead earlier? 

I didn't think so. Sigh.

"GLEE" picked up for another season! Now is the time I make fun of my poor husband...

 

The AMAZING "Rehab" production number on GLEE!

I admit it, I love the new FOX show, GLEE, but not nearly as much as my husband, Stephen. When he hears the news that his favorite show has been renewed for another season he'll break out into song, I assure you.

My gorgeous husband, Stephen.

He really puts up with a LOT from me.

Read on...

Here's a story for you. I tend to tease my poor husband mercilessly about certain things--like his man-crush on Tom Ford (who can blame him?) and the fact that he could easily swap places with Tim Gunn. I've even told him he should be Tim for Halloween--but he says, "But TIM doesn't have a GOATEE!"; clearly he'd do it otherwise. (All together now, "DESIIIIIGNERRRSSSS. We need to have a CAUCUS!") 

My FAVORITE movie when I was

in THIRD GRADE

ANYgay. I was watching the Holy Grail of Queer Cinema (one of them anyway), Hello Dolly, recently. (Which, by the way, Stephen's uncle was the SET DESIIIIIGNERRRR for!!) Stephen stopped dead in the doorway and announced: "I just LOVE a production number!!"  Oh. My. God. My chin was bloody from biting my tongue so that I wouldn't laugh and call him a Big Ol' Girl to his face....which I've done, um...too many times for his liking. 

My Best Gay, Patrick and I have many an inside joke at poor Stephen's expense, but he's has 'em comin', as you can see. 

 "Stephen, my little Love..." as Auntie Mame would say, but to her nephew, Patrick. Auntie Mame is another (Gay-tastic) film that I adore.

I get a lot of (very guilty) pleasure out of teasing Stephen about being able to make "the perfect martini" during his parents' fabulous cocktail parties, just like Mame's nephew Patrick Dennis was able to do for her parties. I love to think of him in "short pants and knee socks" while performing this entertaining feat as a young boy. Naturally, I mention this at least three times a week. "Were you wearing your short pants, Sugar?" It never gets old. To me.

 

And because I'm every bit as queer for Auntie Mame, I'd love for you to read a few of my favorite quotes:


After telling Patrick to write down the words he doesn't know the definition of during a cocktail party:

Mame Dennis: Well, now, uh, read me all the words you don`t understand. 

Patrick Dennis: Libido, inferiority complex, stinko, blotto, free love, bathtub gin, monkey glands, Karl Marx... is he one of the Marx Brothers? Neurotic, heterosexual... 

Mame Dennis: Oh, my my my my, what an eager little mind. [takes the list] Mame Dennis: You won`t need some of these words for months and months.

I'm so glad I married someone who loves these Gay-tastic films as much as I do...oh, yeah. And don't forget to watch GLEE on FOX!!

Uhh...this is all just between you and me, right? 

Breaking News: Stinkfoot Suri walks; Daddy Tom Cruise's pants are too tight!

Stinkfoot clearly borrowed Dad's

Cherry Chapstick 

 

Ummmm...gawd, Tom

What the goddamnhell is Tom Cruise wearing? I'd say a padded bra, first of all. Let's discuss the skinny jeans he clearly bought Forever Hoochie 21 in the Petite's Department.  I didn't know that Nike made old-school hightops with lifts, did you?

And it seems Stinkfoot is now able to walk on her own...and she's running for it. 

RUN SURI, RUN!!